Thursday, July 30, 2009
was discussing with yiyi where we shld have our dinner for my birthday, and she had so many suggestions! but sad to say, quite a number of them reminded me of
you.
i remember dining in crystal jade with you thrice. once for your mum's birthday in 2006. once on v-day in 2007. and last one on my bday in 2007.
i remember bugging you to ding tai fung, but the day never came. probably its always the wrong time when i'm craving for that :/ ahhh.
memories of us kept running through my mind this few days. :
my first stayover. our first movie caught together at cwp before we were tgt. how i hinted you to hold my hand. how you tried to satisfy my cravings for pepper lunch when it's so late and you've never tried it before. the times when we had to babysit both malcolm and manfred esp when manfred just started to learn to walk. you surprised me way before my bday with my bday present and lightsticks. how we celebrated our first v-day tgt. how you planned for our 1st anniversary just to satisfy my wish to take cable car and go sentosa, thus you came up with sky dining. how you always insisted on sending me back when it's late at night cos it isn't really safe in my area. our 2nd v-day tgt. how you celebrated my 21st birthday and organise it for me. our 3rd v-day tgt and i won't forget how you surprised me with the bouquet and pinky heart cushion in your boot.
and i guess there wont be 4th v-day tgt and so on. the sweet memories ended in may...
how i wished i'm not going through what i'm going through now..
11:42 PM
Saturday, July 25, 2009
thanks to you, i've lost both of them.
thanks to you, i've got no more motivation to live on.
thanks to you, i've got no will to live anymore.
-------------------------------------------
i told you, i'm a 好马不吃回头草. if i've let go, i won't go back to him.
why can't you understand?!
i'm dead. u can catch me anywhere.
how i wish you'll be safe, my precious. :(
12:53 AM
Friday, July 24, 2009
will anyone mourn for me if i were to leave, one fine day?when will it be my turn to be in that wooden box? sighh. i'm nearly a quarter into it alreadyt :)
all i'll ever ask, is for ralph to be well taken of. that's all.
12:25 AM
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
on MC today, damn sucky. was coughing like mad on the way to work, and i vomitted just when i was about to reach my workplace. arghh. and i can't get to see the eclipse in singapore at all! with the rain, nothing can be seen -_-" and so, i went to the doc's, gotten my MC and went back his place to accompany my precious :) took porridge, took medicine and off i went to lala land~ woke up only when malcolm came back. haha
oh oh, and i think i'm falling in love with purple roses! someone showed me 99 and 101 purple roses.. wheee~ if only i can get the bouquet of it in my hands.. ahhhh~ *slaps myself to stop dreaming* will upload the picture later~ hee.
OH! was MSN-ing with michele just now, and we were talking about cooking and baking hahahs. i prefer baking to cooking whereas she prefer cooking to baking. so we suggest to have a cooking session and she's gonna do the cooking, and yours truly will do the baking! i have so many recipes but no ingredients and time =x i wanna try making ice cream myself! will get the ingredients soon and make it~ once i get my oven, i gonna start my baking journey~ i wanna bake alaska cake.. and cheese cake! hee. oh yeah i wanna try home made mango pudding also~ ahhhh, speaking of which, i think i'm hungry.. :( but.. i really need to hit the sack soon! the medicine's taking effect already..
shall upload the few pictures first~
baked alaska when its "set on fire", nice hor??
11:43 PM
Monday, July 20, 2009
supposed to meet up with bestie sansan in the morning for k-lunch~ but due to some reasons, she couldn't make it and thus we changed it to dinner :) had a satisfying 10 hr of slp, finally! and i woke up to dacia's MSN message :p
met dacia up at 3.30pm (i was late) at LOT 1.. walked around and decided to grab a bite at long john silver's.. met 3 of my students there hahas, damn coincidence (: they keep di siao behind dacia lols.. keep hi here hi there hi miss han -_-" kids are kids lols.. and they're so excited after getting toys from Jurong Point's Kiddy Palace hahaha.. yeah and they left earlier than us and we had a long long chat there.. walked around again and we discussed about the upcoming Tioman trip and probaby Taiwan trip again at the end of this year :D ps: thanks for your extremely advanced birthday gift!!
bestie sansan reached at 6pm+ and dacia left..
went to Kranji's This Fashion and bestie tried some tops but none caught her eyes! haha.. so we MRT-ed to woodlands :) headed to Causeway Point, walked around and decided to dine at Seoul Garden :p wheee~ it feels great to eat when you're not feeling good, indeed! tee hee~ and we end up to be the last customer to leave :P camwhored in the toilet till the management off air-con and partial lights =x whahaha.. and we MRT-ed back. :) ps: thanks for your bracelet hee, i HEART it!!
i feel so loved, to have friends like them :) i'm glad they stood by me after so long...
till den~
12:06 AM
Saturday, July 18, 2009
its been a day, and i've been thinking..
there's so many dreams and trips yet to be fulfilled.
- you were asking me just last saturday how much it cost to go taiwan cos you wanted to bring ur mum and me there together, it's gone forever and it will never ever happen to me.
- you promised to bring me to marina barrage and mustafa just a week or two ago, and this trip will never ever come cos the other party isn't you. going with others is a different story already.
- i was talking to you about that little diamond ring i wanted to get, and you asked me not to get it and assured me that you'll get a bigger and nicer one for me once you've gotten your commission. this ring will never get the chance to reach me because, i'm in no position to receive it anymore.
- all the promises to bring me to the zoo, sentosa, KTV and blah blah blah will never ever come again.
- and finally, my wish to celebrate my birthday with malcolm's is not gonna happen. i actually wanted to get cupcakes to replace cake this year. sigh. the thought of celebrating it without you, aches me alot.
there's so many things we wanted to do together other than these mentioned above, and i'm not gonna be the one to go through with you...
i hate to say this but, i think i'm useless. i dunno how long am i gonna take to pick myself up from this fall but, i'm beginning to wonder if i really wanna stay in this state forever.
just let me be.
3:21 PM
Friday, July 17, 2009
this is my 801th post, and this ends everything.
my garden of smiles has quit, my pillar of strength has left.
i'm on my very own from this moment on. i wanna blog this and remember this very date 170709.
the day when everything crashed on me and i still gotta be strong.
my world will never be colourful again, and i've made certain decisions to change my life.
i'm gonna study and have a change of job.
i wanna get my bike license, after i succeed in completing another task.
and i'm gonna grab someone for a short getaway with me. anyone? (: (I NEED IT BADLY)
thank you for having loved and doted me before. (i dunno if u still do)
thank you for being heartless enough to tell me in the face.
thank you for taking care of my girl all these while, and in the future.
thank you for your surprises until the beginning of the year.
and, i thank you for spoiling me like a princess for the last 3 years.
thank you for delaying your resignation for the past 2 months, and its been 3 years, 1 month and 11 days since we got together and it has to end this way.
i can only say thank you, thank you and thank you.
thank you for being there when i'm not happy, c.
thank you for being my chauffuer lately, s.
thank you for willing to spare me your morning later, a.
i appreciate these from the bottom of my heart. thanks.
i guess i just need some time, to get used to everything.
being single seems to be weird to me, it's been so long since i was one.
i gotta enjoy, i gonna enjoy, i wanna enjoy..
girls just wanna have fun~
2:54 AM
Thursday, July 16, 2009
上帝创造天地万物,
做了七天的时间,
他将最美丽的事物都放在世人的面前,
所以人生在世,
无论你经历过什么,
只要你懂得珍惜,
一切都可以是最美好的!
12:05 AM
Sunday, July 12, 2009
its been so long since i last heard that word from you.. when will i ever get to hear it again?? ):
i envy them...
4:05 AM