you're flying anytime now, sis. do take care, i believe they will take very good care of you.. i'll be all alone at home everyday now. yes, i think i sound extremely contradicting.. close friends will know that i always complain about this and that all about her.. but i guess deep down i'm actually concerned about her.. lol i'll miss her complaints, miss her naggings and such.. but on a lighter note, i'll have peace at home? but too peaceful is scary to me at times like this ): whatever, 17 days will breeze by, right? :)
anyways, wanna share this video which has 小天, the hottie in it!! and hmmm, kinda like this song :) enjoy!!
will be going st james tml despite coughing like mad today~ dun wanna miss out the fun :)
4:50 PM
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
i'm still pondering, what have i done wrong? many have told me, i did not do anything wrong, so why did it happen so? what have gone wrong in the process? is it really just you,just me, or both of us? all i can hope for the outcome is, we'll still be the same; no change at all. but is it possible? this is the only wish i have now. just a simple wish, will u grant me my wish?
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giddiness has been visiting me very often and i've fainted twice recently ): what's coming up next? i dare not step into the clinic to know more.. let's just pray it's fatigue; due to lack of rest and sleep (: now, i hope for the best and good health to everyone~ i just want everyone around me to be healthy.. i need not be, because what's gonna happen.. will happen (:
everything happens for a reason, is it really so....?
8:42 PM
Monday, May 25, 2009
i'm blogging at this hour, at this time because i know that no one reads my blog anymore which includes him (:
sleepless nights are my best friends lately.. (: they company me through the night, watching me. restaurant city is my fav game now, because i'll be busy doing this and that till i forget everything (: superb! wedding dash and sally's salon not bad too..
do you know that you worried me alot on friday? the look on your face, the moment you ran with them chasing after the two, made my heart stopped for a moment. i didn't know what to do, do you know how i felt? i only came back to sense when i saw her running, i dunno why but my legs started running too, with your contact lens still in my hands. and i felt so relieved when i saw you standing there safe and sound. in one full piece. and the moment you held me, i'm very certain that you're there with me and its not a dream. the feeling's so unexplainable and i can't put it in words. i just felt so.. relieved..
will blog abt xiang's bday another day (:
if i ask, will you stay? i must think logically.. i must think straight.. i must be strong... i'm all on my own... i'm a lone ranger!!!
12:59 AM
Thursday, May 21, 2009
it's the 7th day of your departure at 12am later.. and you'll drop by your place.. i'll pray that yiyi gets to see you, because she really do miss you.. dearly.. i'm glad that you visited her last night.. she's really happy..
on another note.. aahhh. everything changed so fast. i'm trying to get used to all the changes, because i'm superwoman! :) met up wif 2 friends consecutively yesterday after work. friend 1for ice-cream and arcade at westmall and friend 2 for dinner and heart-to-heart talk at causeway point! WOOHOO, it's been so long since i did meet ups wif dem :D indeed, the arcade game friend 1 recommended was very stress-relieving! wahahaha, i'd so much wanna place again (: and i wanna thank friend 2 to be there when i needed a listening ear and vice versa (: heh, but worst of all i couldn't finish my meal T_T but hope it helps me to slim down abit lah~ since i dun really have appetite since last wk (i've been skipping breakfasts).. yay!
and i wanna post today to remind myself that.. i should really cross road CAREFULLY. nearly got knocked down this morning, lucky one of the passerby pulled me away. phew. had a shock, till now.. and i'm still shaking.. hurr. but, it's okay! coz i'm superwoman and i will shall pull through :)
till then...
7:16 PM
Saturday, May 16, 2009
RIP friend.
expected it, but still can't take it.
won't be able to get over so fast,
but i'll try.
will get you to get over it too :)
i'll tryi'm able to get over it.
i have to.
and lastly, i'll miss you, my friend.
it's hard to accept the 2nd death of a friend within a year. it's more than devastating.
10:54 PM
Friday, May 15, 2009
i can't be the 1st even after 3 years, or maybe 30 40 years later it's still the same.
i won't get the care and concern i expected from you even if its 30 40 years later it's still the same.
i think i should know where i stand, and not demand more.
i should be the one lying on the bed waiting to die, not him.
i'm not as fillial as him.
i'm not as gifted as him.
i'm not as clever as him.
he doesn't deserve all these, but WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE HIM?!
i think i should go bang wall, and think through.
i shouldn't be having sucha good life at all.
maybe, my time will be up soon, i dunno...
i'm devastated.
but if u'd feel more comfortable leaving, pls do.
we dun wanna see u suffer.
it's been a long run, we understand
thouogh we'd wished that you needn't leave and go through all these
but seeing u in pain, suffering
makes our heart break, especially ur mum.
if u choose to leave,
pls do remember us.......
remember the times we shared, the happy times we all spent together
and the times we drank.
everything just came at once, and i can't react to everything that happened within a week.
i suddenly feel that i'm not understand anymore, i'm not
maybe, the "understanding jinling" is dead.
pls welcome the selfish jinling...
i'm devastated, no i should be strongremorseful
11:11 PM
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